Sleepless nights

Tell this day  

I never slept at night 

And never could  

I guess that because I find it boring as a child and looked down on every adult who wasted a chance to enjoy those little moments, I did cherish, mostly because I enjoyed the darkness of the night, and found it beautiful. Also, the thrill given by staying awake without the consent of my parents kept me doing it again. Nobody can fight the desire of the prohibited fruit, right? 

 As a kid all you want is to play more with toys whom you gave life to by naming them and giving them story you wish to be yours to tell. 

Growing up, things didn’t change. I was using excuses, as I wanted to study, to stay awake again. It's not a lie, though; living with a big family as a girl, I needed space so I could study, so the night was my only choice. However, the night still was my companion; the loneliness and quietness given by her was a charm or magnetic that always succeeded in pulling me every time. Especially when you enter the last two years of high school, it turns into a chaos, and the only thing that you need at that point is me time. 

But now I feel like I’m starting to lose the cape given to me by Superman. I can’t stay awake for a long time like I did before; the night now feels like escapism more than a magical moment, and sleeping feels like waving my giving up flag. 

Yet I still want to stay here for another night...